I’ve been a bit of a hot mess over the last month, to be honest with you. Following a really busy period I had really thought early summer would be the time things came together. The new build would speed ahead. I’d start looking at the fun things like branding and colour schemes, enjoy a chilled out summer with my boys, poring over vision boards and Pinterest when they were in bed (at 7pm every night obvs.).
Ok, so I never thought it would be that easy, but I had hoped things would start falling into place around now. I’ve been piling the pressure on to my husband, Cheggs, who is managing the project. We work very differently, and not without clashes. I love lists. I love matrixes even better, that not only list tasks but put them boxes according to level of importance and time pressures. I’m never without my diary (I use the Trigg life mapper – I LOVE it and recommend to anyone looking for something that helps create balance and order across all areas of your life).
Let’s just say Cheggs works differently.
Things were at a head last week when I felt decisions just weren’t getting made quick enough. I was ready to race ahead, with my departure from the Golf Club looming in the not too distant future, things just couldn’t be done quick enough, and the pressure was starting to show.
However, there have been subtle clues that I’m getting ahead of myself, and that maybe my GO-GO-GO method isn’t quite working.
I invited a friend for lunch and to chat over our marketing strategy as she’ll (hopefully) be involved in this area. It didn’t take her long to pick up on the subtle issues between myself and Cheggs and our contrasting (read clashing) styles of working. It quickly became apparent that instead of thinking about the website, or the interior design, or any of the other million and one things on my lists, we actually need to spend some time working on our team (Team Me and Cheggs!).We’re both self employed so we’re used to being our own boss and doing things our own way. We need to work on compromising, communicating with each other, on intrinsic values such as love and respect and patience. And if we don’t we’ll both be at breaking point before the project is finished.
It also made me rethink leaving the Golf Club as planned at end of June. I started to ask myself if I was putting unnecessary pressure on the whole process, on our family, on my business and on myself. I’ve been looking around for places to teach over the summer, thinking about reduced timetables, wondering how long it will be until the new build is finished (as long as a piece of string, of course). I’m so ready to be in our new studio, but the studio isn’t ready for me, and whether I like it or not, my impatience isn’t really speeding things up.
So I’ve taken a step back and I’m rethinking my strategy. I can’t control everyone and everything (despite trying), so I’m going to work on the things that are my responsibility and try and give the people around me the space and time to so the same.
I had a message from the Golf Club on Thursday, at a timely moment in my planning – as they don’t have anyone ready to move in straight away it’s possible for me to extend my lease.
On the one hand it feels like an acknowledgement that I haven’t been able to meet my deadlines and commitments, or as my “inner critic” would say, that I’ve failed. However when I let go of my ego I see that actually its’s ok to slow down – pushing on to prove a point to myself, at the expense of relationships and my family, isn’t the way I want to do this. I don’t need to rush so much. We could all do with a little less pressure.
So, I’ll be staying put at the Golf Club for the next few months. It’s a relief in many ways, and I’m sure those of you who regularly attend classes will be happy that disruption to our timetable will be a minimum (except for my regular summer holiday saunters).
And the new studio… where is that? There have been a lot of decisions made over the last few weeks. Looming, heavy and important decisions that were holding things up, and keeping us up at night are now behind us (though there will be more coming soon!).
We’ve got wood cladding on the way, floors are being levelled as we speak. We’ve made decisions on waste and drainage (sexy!), heating (old school rads!) and dance flooring (the best in the biz).
In short, lots of progress (not all visible)… and all being made in it’s own time.
Talking of time, it’s 5 O clock Friday, which means it’s cocktail hour, and Cheggs makes a mean Cosmo….