You are already enough. How many times have you read or heard this. I’ve lost count of how often I’ve used this.
And yet still, do we ever really take it in? And how do you balance the idea that you’re already enough AND you’re striving for more / better / different?
I’ve always struggled with this paradox as a teacher and a student. How do I encourage people to know their enough-ness AND to have a goal or wish for change?
For me personally it looks a little like this.
I have enough. I have enough money and food, a full wardrobe (a few dodgy choices) and a car to get from A to B. I have enough time (though it doesn’t always seem that way). I have a beautiful family. My career gives me massive joy and satisfaction. I love where I live, and deep down I know that I am enough. I am grateful and content.
And yet I still feel lack. Things like… I don’t earn enough – (bills frighten me, the house remains unpainted and I’ve never had a car newer than about 15 years old)! I’m not thin enough or strong enough. I’m not a good enough teacher. I’m not a dedicated enough yogi. As a business person I lack focus and organisational and management skills. My house is never tidy enough. I don’t experience enough wild joy from day to day.
What I’ve realised (very recently) is that my wanting more doesn’t mean I’m not grateful and content with what I have.
For me it looks like this:
I am content and accept myself
AND
I would like more.
I would like my house to be tidier AND my sense of peace and happiness is not dependent on the tidyness of my house.
I want to be a better teacher (I will always strive to be a better teacher) AND I know that I am already a great teacher AND who is continually growing and learning.
I want more money AND I am also happy and grateful for what I have right now. Money will not bring me happiness or freedom – those are mine already. Money will bring me the ability to pay my bills, to paint my house, and to travel.
I want to be in the best shape I can be AND I already love and accept my body as it is.
I want to do a handstand and hold it & I want to meditate more (and without become distracted and thinking about dinner) & I want to get on my mat every day AND I know that, even without that, my practice is perfect as it as.
It’s ok to want more, to strive for better, to want more success, more money, a fitter body, a different career, more joy, more love and more adventures.
AND
This doesn’t mean you’re not already content and grateful. My sense of peace and happiness is not dependent on these external factors. It’s OK to not want more of any of these things or to be drawn to completely different goals.
I wanted to share this for anyone else who has struggled with this paradox – or indeed felt guilty, inauthentic or ungrateful for wanting more!
(It’s also OK NOT to want more! There are loads of things in life that I just don’t care about that totally float other people’s boats – but that’s the whole p